Nicbeast's Nest

iCon. RiP

2011-10-05T18:04:00.001-07:00

Like A Stone

2011-03-15T19:08:00.000-07:00

On a cobweb afternoon in a room full of emptiness
By a freeway I confess I was lost in the pages
Of a book full of death
Reading I will die alone
And if we're good we'll lay to rest
Anywhere we want to go

In your house I long to be
Room by room patiently
I'll wait for you there like a stone
I'll wait for you there alone

On my deathbed I will pray to the gods and the angels
Like a pagan to anyone who will take me to heaven
To a place I recall
I was there so long ago
The sky was bruised, the wine was bled
And there you led me on

In your house I long to be
Room by room patiently
I'll wait for you there like a stone
I'll wait for you there alone
Alone

And on I read until the day was gone
And I sat in regret of all the things I've done
For all that I've blessed and all that I've wronged
In dreams until my death I will wander on

In your house I long to be
Room by room patiently
I'll wait for you there like a stone
I'll wait for you there alone
Alone
Alone

Once more with feeling...

2011-02-02T12:21:00.000-08:00

Yep. You guessed it! It's that time of year one more time.

Here's the thing. I wasn't even thinking about it really. I didn't have much going on. No party planned. There was talk of doing a Dr. Who extravaganza but nothing really came of it. No one is coming to visit. Nothing is scheduled. So, essentially it crossed my mind, maybe once or twice, like is should look around and make sure there was no enemy approaching. I did and nothing. Then BAM. Smacked right upside the head. When will I learn? I should just go away the week surrounding that day. All alone. Maybe a TV and a couple of books. It seems, if I'm alone, then there is less likely for something to go and ruin or taint the day.

I mean other than the prep for the surgery last year, that was one of the best birthday's I'd had in YEARS! Wrong, yes? True, though. How I wish to be in a semi private hospital room with a barfing roommate. Sounds like heaven right about now.

"Hows your pain level?"
"Through the roof."
"OK. We'll take care of that."
"Thank you so much."

Today is a bad day. Really, bad, fucking day. At least now I have a plan with contingencies built in. I've got a death grip on that like you wouldn't believe.

So, here's to the plan. May it fucking work.

Some may find this post offensive. You've been warned.

2011-01-04T13:07:00.000-08:00

Dear God,
Let me get this straight. I got tired of all your bullshit, and looking over my shoulder and broke up with you. Since you couldn't hurt me, you go after those close to me? My family? My pets? Have I got this right? You know what? You're an asshole and a fucking coward!

Signed,
The Bitch Who Hates You

Help, please?

2010-09-26T21:32:00.000-07:00

I have something big coming up tomorrow. Really big. Really, really big! Super important! No joke. So I am here, hat in hand, asking for well wishes, positive vibes, prayers, good thoughts, charms, spells. Whatever you have to give, I need it. If you wouldn't mind. Please. Thank you!

Pinocchio

2010-09-24T21:56:00.000-07:00

I am not one to jump into a rant, but I am tired, tired, tired of all the shenanigans, lies and accusations being hurled in my breathing space. It surprises me the lengths people will go to, to be perceived as the victim.

You either post blogs, send emails, or “speak online” to people, all to spread the word of “poor me”. If that’s not enough, please, let’s also make sure that you make unrealistic requests then manipulate them to elevate your sad, misunderstood, “poor me” circumstance. You constructed a reality around you that bares no resemblance to actual reality, and I bet if I called you on your lies and backed you into a corner, you would get defensive and spew sewage and try to turn the tables to make me/us/them look we are the ones committing the wrong doing. Give it up. No one is falling for it, except for maybe the poor sap that I will address later.

I guess it shouldn’t surprise me your loyalty is shit. When I/us/them asked you to keep something to yourself, not only did you tell everyone, but are probably embellishing it to make me/us/them look worse. I also have a sneaking suspicion all your “medical issues” are either made up or in your head to serve as a convenient excuse as to your behavior. I am looking forward to the day when you cannot keep track of all your lies. I’m sure you’ll blame me/us/them for your inability.

It would also stand to reason you don’t realize you come across as a sociopathic or professional liar. I’m not sure which one. A sociopath is typically charismatic, manipulative, self-centered, goal oriented liar who does it in order to get their way with out concern for others. Professional liars on the other hand, are really completely tuned in to the process of lying. Professional liars are sleek, cunning in the way they present their lies, and they are often extremely calculative in their approach. You can see my perplexity; they are very similar. I bet there’s a crossover. Of course, if you want to add a third to the mix, look at the pathological liars, they have a melodramatic or even a narcissistic personality disorder. That fits, too. So, you pick which one you would rather be. All options suck if you ask me, but try to find the lesser of the three evils that you can live with. Go ahead, I’ll wait.

Now, let’s take a moment to touch on the poor saps you have hoodwinked into following and believing you. My bet is that they are “damaged” somehow. It would make them easy prey. To them I say, “You have instincts, use them!” Hopefully they will learn to think for themselves and fact check, maybe look at all sides of the situation as well. I know it sucks to find out your friend is one of these liars and your pretty little pink bubble would burst, but hey, with any luck, you still have your bank account intact. Might I suggest you ask for hard evidence (that would be something you can actually see, not something they tell you). I’m sure it is the nemesis of the sociopathic/professional/pathological liar. It would make me really happy to see that squirmy dance.

Just so we are clear, I have some rules I am going to need all liars to follow:

If you are a liar, pipe down. I/us/them don’t want to hear it.
You are not allowed to argue that you are not a liar. Me/us/them all know you are, so see item number 1.
You are not allowed to argue that you hang around with other liars therefore you are not responsible for your lying behavior. Man up or shut up.
I do not care how challenging your life is. Lying about it does not help you or anyone else. Besides, I guarantee, if you stepped outside and looked around there is someone who is worse off than you and not lying about it.
I do not care where you live. If your town is boring and you feel the need to lie to entertain yourself, move.
You also do not get to lie about anyone else. If you must lie, and really, you don’t need to unless you have a gun pointed to your head, and then I would have to weigh the options, only lie about yourself. You don’t think I/us/them know when you are lying about us? You don’t think that shit gets back to me/us/them? You are truly delusional. I wonder what type of liar that symptom falls under.
I will have to use a quote for this one. “If you do any of the above, individually or severally, when the Internets call you out for being clueless, entitled, ignorant and an embarrassment as a human being — and they will — you will not then complain how your words were misunderstood and/or taken out of context and/or that people missed the real point of your argument.” ~John Scalzi~
The above rule applies equally to anyone defending the right of those who lie.
Finally and most importantly, stay away from me. You are a waste of time and I have more than enough to do in my life than to worry about what bullshit your dumb lying ass is spreading.

These rules are effective immediately, please enforce.

Your paranoia (also a sociopathic symptom) is right. If you think I am talking to you, I am.

...and I did it to myself!

2010-07-19T22:03:00.000-07:00

I joined a different gym and was excited to learn they had classes. My last gym didn't. Hell, they didn't even have air conditioning, they will be fired tomorrow. So I roll in for the 5:00 P.M. class, here is how it went.

5:00 - Naively optomistic
5:03 - Wow this is fun!
5:06 - Geeze! This is a Great work out!
5:10 - It's only been 10 minutes? ~worry sets in~
5:15 - Holy cow! 45 more minutes of this
5:19 - Instructor yelling at us to "CHAKE IT! CHAKE IT!" (Translation: Shake it! Shake it!)
5:25 - What are the symptoms of your lungs exploding?
5:27 - I think it feels like this.
5:30 - Are those my lungs lying there?
5:37 - No that is not apathy on my face, it's a death mask.
5:45 - Oh thank God, only 15 more minutes of this.
5:45:20 - Jesus Christ! There is 15 more minutes of this.
5:55 - We enter the cool down phase which should include, oxygen, stretchers and a drip IV.

6:05 - Get ambushed bye the gym staff.
"Have a good workout?"
"Yes thank you."
"What did you do?"
"Took the Zumba class."
"Is that all you do here?"
"No, I just joined Saturday."
"Have you done your free orientation yet?"
"Is that the tour?"
"No, one of the trainers shows you how to use all the equipment."
"No." My muscles begin to quiver.
"Well let's set you up!"
Clearly he has not taken the Zumba class or he wouldn't be asking me this. But since my head is all full of Wrackspurts I agree to go in at 4:00 tomorrow and learn how to use the equipment. Last time I did that, I couldn't move for a week. I did this to myself...

I chose the picture because it reminded my of a chalk body outline.

See?

The countdown starts...

2010-02-01T23:56:00.000-08:00

<a href="http://www.7is7.com/otto/countdown.html?year=2010&month=2&date=8&hrs=13&ts=24&min=0&sec=0&tz=local&lang=en&show=dhms&mode=r&cdir=down&bgcolor=%23CCFFFF&fgcolor=%23000000&title=Surgery%20Count%20Down">Surgery Count Down</a>

Add one more day for my birfday...at least I get to legally spend it on drugs!

Picture Perfect

2010-02-01T00:20:00.000-08:00

The nice thing about walking is the scenery. I mean, I generally walk the same path change it up a little but depending on the weather and animals, things change. Here are some pictures from my walk the last couple of days.

I got two new cameras for Christmas. The one I took these pictures with is a Samsung TL220. Small little point and shoot. Takes pretty good pics, no?

The second one I got was a Nikon D5000. I. LOVE. MY. CAMERA! It allows you to change lenses! So now I'm hoping to get new lenses for it. I want a telephoto. I think it would be fun to take those out door shots with it.

OK. That's all I got. Well it's not, but I'm tired. We'll talk more later...

And just becuase...

Yum.

TOLD YOU SO! ( a continuation of It's my pity party and I'll whine if I want to)

2010-01-26T13:26:00.000-08:00

Today's phone conversation with my dr's office:

Me: Hi. I would like to schedule surgery.

Nurse: OK. Let me pull your chart. When would you like to do it?

Me: As soon as possible. But preferably not on my birthday. (I joke, laughing)

Nurse: OK. Let's see...oh...um. Oh.

Me: What.

Nurse: The date we have available is February 9th. Your birthday.

Me: (I laugh becuase what else can you do) Figures.

I will go in and discuss it with them on Friday...but if it does go down like that, consider yourself warned!

I WANT LOTS AND LOTS OF SYMPATHY BIRTHDAY PRESENTS!!

It's my pity party, I'll whine if I want to!

2010-01-25T22:02:00.000-08:00

I was watching an episode of Grey’s Anatomy. It’s the one where Meredith has appendicitis. She is high as a freaking kite on morphine, headed into surgery where they were gonna cut her open and remove a piece of her insides. I mean think about it, really, take a moment. Remove. Body. Parts. It’s serious business, the risk for infection, something going wrong, bad surgeons, reaction to drugs. Surgery is no joke.
And all I could thing was, “Man! She is soooooooo lucky! She’s on morphine and feels NOTHING! Surgery is so worth it. I wish I were her.”

Yep. It's that time again. Coming up on that evil day. Always causes anxiety, fear and aprehenson. Why? I think the day is cursed. I'm not even sure what I did to incur this kind of karma. If you know, maybe you could clue me in so I can start to make amends.

I know what you're thinking. "Your getting all worked up for nothing. It's still a bit away." And yet, it has already started. There are already feelings of neglect and disintrest. So, on one hand the thoughts run to, why bother? If it's that much trouble don't worry about it. Which has very damaging consequences. On the other hand, let it roll and harbor feelings of resentment which has it's own damaging outcome. I don't know. I suppose I should speak up, but it would be a coin toss as to how that would go. I'd have to wait, too. Why? Because I can't think of a nice way to say what's on my mind. It all sounds venomous. Not a good way to open a dialog.

I never thought I would be this age and be in the situation I am now. (Those of you who know, know. Sorry for the cryptic, this issue is not for popular consumption) It hurts. It's devastating and I feel broken. You'd think that a mile stone birthday would be something to celebrate. Something to care enough about to put effort into. I guess not. Thanks.

I guess I'll go find my therapists phone number, I'm thinking I'm gonna need a few hundred sessions to work this out.

And we're walking, we're walking...

2010-01-22T23:01:00.000-08:00

Some pictures from when I walk.

Fresh!

2010-01-03T22:12:00.000-08:00

Start fresh. Remember, you haven't messed
anything up in 2010.

(Unless you work really fast.)

You haven't made mistakes, you have no regrets.
It's a clean slate to do with what you please.

2010

2010-01-02T21:30:00.000-08:00

Well, Happy New Year everyone! I hope everyone had a great holiday season. Ours was nice. Turkey day spent up in Washington with the cousins. They taught me how to shoot guns. How much fun was that? More fun than decent people oughta have!

Christmas was spent here at our new house. Something like 12 people showed for dinner. I was really touched. I figured on a few would come. Made me feel good.

New Year's was spend home. Quiet. Made split pea and ham soup for dinner watched a movie. Barely made it up to midnight. So lame. LOL. New Year's Day, I mostly slept. I didn't sleep very well when I finally did go to bed. I made black-eyed peas for dinner. I'd never had them before let alone made them. They were very tasty!

All the kitties are good. Eight continues to escape, but she comes back so I'm less stressed over it.

I'm gonna get a camera for Christmas. Yes I know it has already passed but, The Man and I always get our gifts later. Less stress that way. I may go tomorrow. The man is getting a surround sound system with a Blue-Ray player.

Oh, turns out the two trees that are producing in the back yard are Lemon and Tangerine. Who knew? Clearly not me. I bought a juicer so I could juice the lemons and freeze them. I don't know WHAT to do about the Tangerines. Want some?

Still haven't found a job, hopefully something cool will come soon.

I've managed to go a whole nine months with out surgery! Yay me!!

SOUNDGARDEN IS GETTING BACK TOGETHER!!!!

Did anyone make any goals for the year? Resolutions? Wishes? I'd like to hear them!!!

That's all I got for now.

You like me! You really, really like me...or...

2009-12-22T20:32:00.000-08:00

...they are just really hungry. I invited 10 people for Holiday dinner Friday, thinking only about half would come. Usually how it works. They all said yes. I don't have that many matching place settings lol! My table isn't that big! I'll have to pull out the card tables. I hope they like rustic!

Menu

Appetizers
Little Smokies in BBQ Sauce (why? I was hungry when I went shopping.)
Baked Brie with Chutney
Chips and Dip

Main
Horseradish Crusted 10 Pound Rib Roast
Yummy Potatoes (Thank you Sarah)
Yorkshire Pudding either plain or bacon and chives
Green Beans Sauteed with Bacon (and other herbs or something...still deciding)
Roasted Carrots and Parsnips
Rolls

Dessert
Various Pies (like 3 or 4 - Thanks Timmy)
Homemade Cheesecake for Kate

I need staff...

Oh, and...
Dear Santa,
I need a few things for my new house. One of them is a couch. I'd like this one with all the accessories. Thank you in advance for your anticipated generosity!

Nicbeast

SHE'S HOME!!

2009-12-01T21:11:00.001-08:00

Eight is back! Too happy for words!

"Eight" Missing

2009-11-29T16:38:00.000-08:00

This is my cat "Eight". Microchip number: 4A7F205A18

She is an 18 month old Calico (or Tortise) depending on who you ask.

She went missing Saturday night, November 28, 2009 from 9th Street in Gilroy, CA.

We just moved to the area and she is not familiar with the neighborhood.

This is Eight with her sister "Six".

(no we don't name all our animals after numbers ;-) )

Six is wandering around the house and back yard "calling" for her. It's shattering my already broken heart.

If you see them please contact me.

408-835-0451 cell

nicbeast@gmail.com

Thank you for helping us find our kitty!

http://sfbay.craigslist.org/sby/laf/1487250001.html

Fuck You!

2009-11-28T22:20:00.000-08:00

If everyone is so hot to get away from me, then get the fuck out. Fuck. Them. All. Fuck everyone, dumb shit mother fuckers. And just so we are clear, I am NOT you fucking emotional punching bag, dumb fuck!

Delinquent Letter

2009-11-26T13:16:00.000-08:00

I've been meaning to write this letter for months now.

Mr. J. J. Abrams

c/o William Morris Endeavor Entertainment
(Talent and Literary Agency)
9601 Wilshire Blvd.
3rd Floor
Beverly Hills, CA 90210
USA

Dear Mr. Abrams,

I'ma need you to cease and desist all other entertainment endeavors and concentrate solely on making more Star Trek movies.

Thank you in advance for you anticipated cooperation.

Sincerely,

Nicbeast

HOME SWEET HOME

2009-10-16T20:22:00.000-07:00

Ladies and gentlemen,

the hunt is over!!

Our New Home!

Beds: 4

Baths: 2.5

Sq. Ft.: 2918

Lot Size: 7000 Sq. Ft.

Stories: 2

A LOT OF HOME, live in a home with room to spare. 4 bedrooms, 2.5 baths, large game room separate living and dining room, family room and eat-in kitchen. tile flooring, indoor laundry and large backyard (with fruit trees!!!). All set in an established neighborhood with tree lined streets.

Cleaning, painting and moving start tomorrow!

All are welcome to help!! *cheesy grin*

I had a dream...

2009-10-02T23:09:00.000-07:00

The past couple of days, I've been in some pain. It's like having a screaming headache, but all over your body, from head to toe.

I finally fell asleep last night and actually had a dream about how much pain I was in.

I drove to the dr's office and paced outside the door convincing myself to go in. Feeling like it was silly for me to be there, I told myself I should just suck it up and go home. Next thing I know I'm inside my dr's lobby and they are having some sort of clinic day. I check in at the table and a guy that looks like Anthony Edwards asks about my stats. I tell him this is my regular dr and I have insurance. Smiling he sends me over to wait in a different line. I'm standing there, trying to ignore the pain, when the world around me starts to go dark, from the outside in, like a pin hole. I crumble to the floor, my world has gone black except for a flash of light here and there; some woman yelling instructions, people rushing around me then total darkness.

I wake on a gurney in a hospital. A very kind nurse starts asking me questions about my memories. I answer her and realize she is checking to see if I'm coherent or hit my head.

Then I wake.

You think it's my body telling me I'm crazy not go to the dr?

...

2009-09-30T22:30:00.000-07:00

...Wait for it....

Out!

2009-09-17T16:50:00.000-07:00

We are out of the 2 bed 1.5 bath, 1200 sq.ft. town house and in the 1bed 1 bath, 800 sq.ft. apartment...I'm feelin' some kinda way about it...

Kill me now.

House hunting, Stress is thy name...

2009-09-14T21:26:00.000-07:00

Sunday we rented a Uhaul truck again to move all the big stuff. Nic-B.I.L. and Nic-friend came and helped us along with Nic-mom. It went so fast with all of us!! True family and friends help you move. Period. It's a shitty job and they do it for food! I love them mucho!

We drove them by The Short Sale, tried to break in to show them around, no go. LOL. So then we went to The Other House and what do you know, they were having an open house! I was like Oh...no... If they are still having open houses they are still accepting offers. We went in and looked around. A couple couple of realtors were there along with a finance person. Everyone in our group pretended like we haven't put an offer in already. Everyone seems to like it. Like I said most of the stuff is cosmetic, lipstick and rouge. This whole house buying thing is a trip...

Oh for heaven's sake...

2009-09-11T21:44:00.000-07:00

Lemme tell you 'bout my day. Wake, shower, eat breakfast. Nothing too exciting there. The I go donate blood in honor of 9/11. I also figure I'd want someone to donate if I needed it, plus good karma.

Next, I pick up my chap labor (mom) and take her to Taco Bell becuase, well she wanted it. Then we head back to the apartment, pick up some boxes and go back to the old address to pack up my clothes. Four cardboard boxes full of my shoes and purses, a trip to Wally World to buy 30 Gallon plastic containers later we have every thing packed up. Mind you, only the pile clothes marked "Take" could fit in my car. All the shoes and purses and clothes going to storage are still there. I have so much stuff...How is it I have nothing to wear????

Anywho, we load up the car, I race to Safeway to pick up stuff for dinner, (I made bbq chicken pizza, y'all it was goooooooooooood!) then back to the apartment. Mom wants to unload the car, but having given blood today I was pooped. So I started dinner and went to check my email. I find this from our realtor...

"...I did get a email from XXX on The Short Sale and your offer has been accepted and is in position one...I am sure if we get The Other House you would probably drop The Short Sale?..."

SAY WHAT????????

So I call our realtor and discuss this turn of events. He is correct. If we get The Other House, we will drop The Short Sale. As I have said, I'm not in love with that one. I guess this explains why it went pending. Good Lord. So we should know by Monday I guess. I'm so conflicted...

Another one bites the dust...

2009-09-10T22:26:00.000-07:00

I think...

Well, when we went onto the listing site, it says the short sale we bid on went pending. Nice of the bank to tell anyone...

So, now we wait...

Be vewwy, vewwy quiet...I'm hunting houses!

2009-09-09T21:23:00.000-07:00

Well, we found another house we liked that is a short sale. I'm not crazy about the house its self. The layout is not quite so open and kinda strange and the rooms are small. They did usurp the room next to the master to make it bigger but it's...strange. The back yard however is fantastic!! Sorry I don't have pictures of the back, but here is the front. Since it's a short sale, I don't expect to hear back from the bank. LOL.

"Great curb appeal inside and out. Come and see for yourself. This home features 3 bedrooms and 2 bathrooms over 1700 SF of living space. Mature neighborhood, Quiet neighborhood, and a great centralized location. Make this your next home. A short sale waiting for your offer. Banks are willing to work with an offer today. Easy to show. Drive by, stop by, or call for a showing of this home. This is a FHA qualified home. Everything appears to be in working condition. This home is close to parks, close to schools and in the middle of all shopping centers. Walking distance to the Levy. 2 car garage and ready to move into."

Bed/Bath: 3 / 2
SqFt: 1,717

Today I went out and looked at another house.

"A LOT OF HOME, live in a home with room to spare. 4 bedrooms, 2.5 baths, large game room separate living and dining room, family room and eat-in kitchen. tile flooring, indoor laundry and large backyard. All set in an established neighborhood with tree lined streets."

Man, they aren't kidding! This place is huge! For us, anyway. The decor is...questionable, but mostly just paint and carpet. Everything looks good; roof, new windows. There is RV parking and the yard is manageable. There are fruit trees in the back yard, lemon, cherry, plumb and peach! YUM!

Bed/Bath:4 / 2 1/2
SqFt:2,918
Lot:7,000 sq ft
Yr Built / Age:1977 / 32 years

The bathrooms have been redone, do you SEE that mint paint and teal carpet? So odd... I mean, I love the 80's, but damn! But, that's just lipstick and rouge! We put in a bid. A BIG one! Huge! I'm not sure it will win but, dammit, we are in the hunt!!!

WE COULD BE HOME OWNERS BY THE WEEKEND Y'ALL!!!

Oh and since all my other business is concluded, (YAY!) My blog is back to being open!!! WOOT!!

And the winner is...

2009-09-04T21:21:00.000-07:00

Not us.

Oh well. Well be heading out tomorrow afternoon for to look at some more houses...

NEXT!

Ugh!

2009-09-01T19:55:00.000-07:00

There are seven bids on the house...no surprise.

We upped our offer...not by much but still...

The Captain and I look about the same right now....

Christ Almighty

2009-08-31T22:53:00.000-07:00

We put an offer on Bam #2...

Of course, we'll get out bid but holy crap! WE PUT AN OFFER ON A HOUSE!!!

Imma be a mess for a bit. Please excuse me in advance.

Still Hunting

2009-08-30T19:13:00.001-07:00

Looking, looking, looking. Handfulls of houses, nothing exciting then bam! No wait more like BAM BAM!

#1

Bed/Bath:	4 / 3
SqFt:	2,117
Lot:	7,000 sq ft
Yr Built / Age:	1985 / 24 years

The first BAM is well with in our price range. Needs some work but nothing that would make it tough to live in while we refurbished. It also has a pool, which honestly for me, isn't a selling point. But it has good structure. I like it. Big kitchen! Even a bit excicted about it, though I was trying not to be. The realtor tried to get info on the place this weekend and all the websites and what not were being changed and by the time he did get in, it said there were no listings for our city. He's not convinced he thinks it may be a computer thing, transferring files and what not, so he's gonna call the agent on Monday. *Crosses Fingers*.

#2

Bed/Bath:	4 / 2
SqFt:	2,147
Lot:	7,040 sq ft
Yr Built / Age:	1981 / 28 years

The second BAM is a little high for us but absolutely beautiful. Move in ready. The price is a little high and we would kinda be stuck for a minute...a bit house poor, but no work needs to be done. GREAT KITCHEN! *sigh*. The price makes me nervous. I have a call into our finance person to check on what the payments would be so, we'll see. I don't have any pictures of the first house, they have disappeared which leads me to belive that the house is already pending, but here are the some of the second house.

So, keep your fingers crossed for us. If you would like to donate to our housing there is a paypal button on the side of the blog lololol!

Also, the packing starts in earnest tomorrow for the move next weekend. I hate packing. So, anyone who has nothing better to do than help me pack and move is more than welcome!

Home Sweet Heartbreak

2009-08-10T22:44:00.000-07:00

Bed/Bath: 3 / 2
SqFt: 1,475
Lot: 9,500 sq ft
Yr Built / Age: 1955 / 54 years
List Price: More than we can realistically afford

Beautiful corner lot, with 3 car garage and wonderful BBQ area. Complete new kitchen in garage ready to be installed in home. Hardwood floors and newer windows with some updating in bathrooms. This home has so much potential. With a little TLC could be a show place! Close to down town and shopping. Walk to library.

This house is so wonderful. I mean you see that front window and those floors? That back yard! Perfect for entertaining. That covered shelter, has a SINK!! It also has a butcher block cutting board!!! AND LOTS OF STORAGE!! What really hurts, is...it is SO CLOSE to what we can afford!! And the houses in this neighborhood NEVER go on sale! I knew this would break my heart. It was one of those times when the voice in your head said, "Don't! Do! It! DON'T LOOK!" and I ignored it. We both did. We both loved the house. We immediately started scheming. How could we do some creative financing. Then I started getting this sort of feeling of dread as we were hatching our plan. When I quieted my self I knew it wasn't meant to be. I realized every thing we were saying was negative. "Well if we don't do this...or if we don't do that. We won't be able to do these things...." I don't think it's the right way to start off.

So bully for me for being the voice of reason and saying we should stick to our plan. I mean, things have been falling into place. There is no reason we should start trying to force puzzle pieces into place. I'm not saying we should not work for what we want, but this just feels strained and artificial. I mean we could go in and offer less but it seems silly and quite frankly it's insulting. :-) Besides, once people get wind of this gem, there will be multiple bids. We just can't afford it. We're doing the right thing. Right?

House Hunters

2009-08-09T21:55:00.000-07:00

Today was our first going to open houses. Wasn't too bad, only three with our requirements. The first one was nice. Big kitchen, laminate floors through out, nice yard. They already had three offers on it and if we wanted it we'd have to make one by 2:00 tomorrow. Well, it was nice, but we didn't like it that much and we really aren't in the position to be making an offer that soon anyway.

The second one was priced really low! Like $100k less...and we saw why. I mean with that extra $100k we could make a really bitchen house! LOL. But, to do that would be A LOT of work. I'm not too keen on it. It is also a foreclosure so that makes me twitchy. When we got there the realtor wasn't even there. I found a way in! LOL! By the time he showed we were done looking. He'd never even been through the whole place. We talked to him for a minute and found out about it being a foreclosure. That's why, I guess.

Third house was lovely! Nicely redone. Kitchen was tiny, though...and you all know how I feel about that. BUT the rest of the house was nicely redone. Hardwood floors through out, which honestly, after having them AND 4 cats, it's really a pain chasing fur balls all around the house with a broom. The back yard was perfect. Sigh...I think if we were able to, we would have seriously considered making an offer. First weekend out though...

Tomorrow, I'm meeting with our realtor to go look at a bunch of houses, then we will go back out that evening with the man so he can see too.

I also have an apt with my allergist. I think I will fess up this time to my allergies being worse now since the last time I saw him. *cough2extracatscough*

Well that's it for now. I'll keep you posted on what happens tomorrow!

I can see clearly now...

2009-08-06T21:28:00.000-07:00

MY GLASSES ARE IN!!
MY GLASSES ARE IN!!

and

I'm picking them up tomorrow! I'm so McCited!!

Five Rules to Game Over!

2009-08-05T22:59:00.000-07:00

There are rules some professionals haven't seemed to have learned. Let me refresh your memory, or maybe in some cases enlighten you...

1. Do not call people before 8:00 A.M. or after 8:00 P.M. (my preference being before 9:00 AM)

2. When you do call, make sure you know who you are calling. Do not ask for the wrong person.

3. Do not make creepy statements.

4. Do not make insensitive statements.

5. Do not make bad racial jokes.

Game over!

I like to move it, move it! NOT!

2009-08-04T21:38:00.000-07:00

This whole, moving, buying a house thing...one great big bundle of stress!! Again I have to say, this is WAY above my maturity level!

I have been talking with a mortgage broker, she is super nice, very knowledgeable and very helpful. If I get my way, we will go with her. We have pre-qualified and I have now started interviewing Realtors. I have no skill set for interviewing them. I mean, what do you ask? What do I need in a Realtor? Experience. Patience. Knowledge. The ability to calm my ass down when I start freaking out!

We got a local storage unit and I have started moving things from the garage over there. I got some boxes so I'll start packing up things in the house this week I hope. Things like books and maybe stuff from the bathroom we aren't using. I don't really have a clear plan on the order of things. Suggestions welcome!

We filled out an application for an apartment, so I'm taking that over tomorrow. There is no way we will be able to buy a house before we have to be out of this place. So now we have a cushion. We don't want to rush into anything.

On a personal note, I got my eyes checked and got new glasses and sun glasses. The sunglasses are ready to be picked up but I think I will wait for my regular glasses to be ready and make one trip. I am also gonna try ordering some glasses online becuase they are hella cheap! So if they work out I can get a bunch!! Fun!!

And so it begins...

2009-07-23T16:33:00.000-07:00

We got word a while back the townhouse we are renting has been foreclosed on. Meaning? We have to move. The timing isn't bad, though. We are looking to buy our first house. We've had some help; we know an out of state real estate agent who pointed us in a direction to find someone here. Today, I spoke with said person and she has put me in contact with a mortgage broker in our city that is connected with her agency. We will probably also talk to our bank who we have been with FOREVER and seems to have ridden out this financial fiasco and has a good reputation with mortgages.

Am I nervous? Yep. Scared? You bet! Excited? Yes, when I'm not nervous or scared.

More immediately, I'm bummed. I. HATE. MOVING! I. HATE. PACKING! OMG! I don't know if I can express to you how much I hate those things. I wish I were one of those people who could go on vacation and come back to your house all moved. *sigh*

We have a local storage unit, so I am going to start moving stuff over there I think next week. It's a little tough trying to decide what you use and don't. I have an idea of a plan but am leaving my options open...so to speak.

In other news...

River of Death was good. We only had one scary incident. My advice to you, always wear your life vest. Period.

The kittens are evil. They have taken to waking up at 4 or 5 AM to play. When does the kitten thing end? Sheesh! Ok, As I sit here typing this, they are asleep and cute next to me, but Six sleeps with here eyes open...is that weird? Seems weird to me. And she's DREAMING! So she has the REM thing happening so it looks like she's looking around...so bizarre.

Any way, if you don't mind, I think I'll blog about my house hunting experiences with y'all.

See ya later!

Where there's fire, there's...fire...

2009-07-07T21:43:00.000-07:00

Well, the the river we float down is on fire. Well not ON fire, but there are fires up there and the areas we drop in and load out are closed...Presents a problem. What to do, what to do...

I know!! I'll make T-Shirts!!!

What do you think? LOL!

I'm famous!

2009-07-05T16:27:00.000-07:00

They wrote a book about me!

Kittens

2009-07-05T16:00:00.000-07:00

At their cutest...sleeping!

Brand New Day

2009-07-04T21:59:00.000-07:00

I know I've been absent mostly from my blog, but I've had to be. I'm happy to say, in a few weeks if all goes well, that will change. Things seem to finally be drifting in my favor for a change *knocks on wood*.

With that in mind, I think maybe I'll make some resolutions. Well not resolutions, but take some ideas I have and implement them. Make my life more of what I want it to be, or at least, do more of the things I want to do. I'm afraid this may upset some, but if they can't understand that it's time for me to take care my business, then I'll be sad but I'll move on.

What else is new? River of Death.

Yep it's that time again. We are leaving Sunday. We will be camping for the Whole. Damn. Week. Well, we'll break it up here and there with a motel or B&B. I mean how many times do I have to say it...IN-FREAKING-DOOR GIRL! Honestly, I don't even need that much. Shower, bathroom, power, Internet access...I can even do with out the latter if I have my iPhone to keep an eye on stuff.

The new Harry Potter comes out while we are up there. I made it known under no uncertain terms I WILL BE GOING TO SEE THAT. No questions, no discussions. I am NOT playin'.

In other news, I got my AA ...

and people made me walk. So embarrassing. I also discovered I'm 2 semesters away from my BA. So I think that will be coming up on the game plan. Maybe while up at the R.O.D. I can figure out what's what.

For now, I think that's it.

Oh, did I tell you I had a fabulous dream that I was making out with Wentworth? Yum.

LOST

2009-04-21T17:51:00.000-07:00

One of my kittens, Eight, is missing...I'm out of town, and can't do anything about it which makes me feel so useless. Please send positive vibes she comes home soon, safe and sound. My heart is breaking for her. Thanks.

http://sfbay.craigslist.org/sby/laf/1133326082.html

The Unmitigated Gall

2009-03-29T20:44:00.000-07:00

Well, those of you who know me, know I've had some other issues with my health. My stoopit Gallbladder is defective and has to be taken out. I am not happy about this. I might be more afraid as I usually am before a surgery but I'm just too annoyed. I like what the Gallbladder is SUPPOSED to do. I'd like to keep it, but these trips to the ER are a right pain in the, well Gallbladder. When the ER staff knows you, you've been in too many times.

I was worried after dinner out on Friday that I may cause myself another attack, but I just ended up being queasy until late Saturday night. I can live with that.

Tuesday I go under the knife again. I'm doing it here in town this time. No offense to Stanford, which is a WONDERFUL hospital, but it's such a long haul. So if you'd like to come visit me in the hospital I'd LOVE that!!
I am sorry to say, neither Wentworth (who never shows) or Chris Cornell (will be somewhere between TX and GA) will be coming over to help me convalesce but I do have a couple of friends who are gonna step in and help out. I'm quite happy about that.

Well I guess that's it. I'll see ya later. Wish me luck!

How to be a Fangirl

2009-03-25T21:51:00.000-07:00

It's no secret I love me some Chris Cornell. Take 'im anyway I can get him. I will listen to that man sing the phone book. Don't care, no way no how. So imagine my surprise when I find out he's on Twitter and actually "Tweeting"! Yup. I clicked that shit and follow him around like the psychotic fan girl I am.

So, one day I am Twitter Stalking him. He's answering questions, throwing out randoms stuff like that and I tell him, he should use his Black Berry to send pictures to Twitter. He responded.

HE FUCKING RESPONDED!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

So then he asks for help, and people start sending him instructions on how to upload a photo! After some trial and error we get one!! YAY!!! And Awwwwwwwwwwww!!!

Then on his way to the show in Chile. He was at the airport where he got stuck for 12 hours. I'd have killed fools. (And before you even ask, yes I was on the computer trying to find out where exactly IN the airport he was and which flight had been delayed. Hello, my name is Nicbeast and I have a problem.) So I send him another Tweet, to which I get no response. No surprise, lightening never strikes twice. But NOW we get these!!!

Backstage in Chile

Out on stage, Chile

Out on stage, Chile

Crowd in Chile

Billie Jean-Chile

Like a Stone-Chile

Defying the Curfew!-Chile

I am OFFICIALLY the coolest person I know right now. SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!

This would be me!!!

You can see the rest of the pics here.

*stoopid fangirl sigh*

Oh, and my new favorite from his new CD Scream.

Part Of Me Lyrics

Little girl, I love when she talks to me
Got to smile, when she walks that walk with me
I want the girl, but I want a lot
Might cross my mind, but that's where it stops

Ohhhh
That bitch ain't a part of me
No, that bitch ain't a part of me
I said no, that bitch ain't a part of me
No, that bitch ain't a part of me
I said no, that bitch ain't a part of me
No, that bitch ain't a part of me
I said no, that bitch ain't a part of me
No, that bitch ain't a part of-part of-part of me

I love the girl, I'm lovin' the dress she wears
She's got a hold, got a hold of me neck, oh yeah
I wanna cry, the way that she moves
I want the girl, but not what she's going through

Ohhhhh
That bitch ain't a part of me
No, that bitch ain't a part of me
I said no, that bitch ain't a part of me
No, that bitch ain't a part of me
I said no, that bitch ain't a part of me
No, that bitch ain't a part of me
I said no, that bitch ain't a part of me
No, that bitch ain't a part of-part of-part of me

She was so friendly, I had one too many
But now that they tell she was rubbing up against me
But I swear, never meant a thing, she was just a fling
There's no other woman who does it like you

That bitch ain't a part of me
No, that bitch ain't a part of me
I said no, that bitch ain't a part of me
No, that bitch ain't a part of me
I said no, that bitch ain't a part of me
No, that bitch ain't a part of-part of-part of me

It's that time of year again.

2009-02-04T10:29:00.000-08:00

I hate this time of year. You know, birthday time. It scares me. I've said before, my birthdays tend to be bad. I remember when they used to be fun and good and then around, oh I don't know '95 they started to go down hill. The first bad one being everyone forgot. I was Molly Ringwald. It was awful. Only I didn't get the cute guy at the end. Since then I can probably count the number of good birthday's I've had on one hand. You know the ones that leave you feeling happy for a couple days. Now I just hope for not bad and I'm ahead of the game.

Well, I was getting excited about this year. Family coming out, all taking a road trip to have a party and bam. That's what I get for getting my hopes up. I guess there is still time for things to get better, but it's like, now it's already tainted. I know I'm quick to emotion and probaby it's not that bad but I do feel bad. Very bad. So what to do...

I guess use the power of positive thinking. Believe it will be ok, keep saying it will be ok and it will. I can give it a try, but at this point I don't have much faith in it. I surely would do what ever it took to make things better, but I don't know what that is and no one is offering the answer. It's one of those times where you can't seem to do anything right.

So, I'll try to keep from slipping into that dark room again, but I feel its pull. Maybe it's a push. All the things going on in my life that I juggle start to get heavy and weigh me down. People look at me or talk with me and say things like, "Geeze you're going through so much." What choice do I have. I tell people, "If I stop to think about it, I'd curl up fetal and drool." These past couple of days I feel like doing just that.

AAAAARRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!

2009-01-10T18:00:00.000-08:00

WHY AM I HAVING SURGERY ON THE DAY OF THE INAUGURATION????

Remember this one?

2008-12-18T17:33:00.000-08:00

CALL ME BUTTER, I'M ON A ROLL!!!

Now, I have a few words to say about the holidays... They make me grumpy!! I know there is supposed to be all this good will and love and blah blah blah but I think a lot of it is bullshit. I think most of it is about jocking for position. People plan for holidays who will be where and when and all. I think it is a power play. I don't think they really CARE where the holiday is spent, it is just about telling people what to do where to go and when. If people actually cared about their loved ones, they would say things like, "How is you life right now? Would it be easier if we came to you or you came to us? Or do you have any better ideas?" But no they just call you and say meet at so and so's house and bring the side dishes! (edit: or in my case the main dish and all the side dishes!) I know the ones who are sincere and I know who is just trying to be the "Alpha". Well fuck them all! This year I AM THE GOD DAMN ALPHA! WE WILL DO WHAT THE HELL I. SAY. DO! Fucking Deal With It!

Try it! Just try it, fucker! I dare you!

Ah, the memories...nothing has changed.

Fools are still trying to control shit. Too fucking bad!!

I, NICBEAST, being of (reasonably) sound mind,

AM TAKING CHRISTMAS BACK!!

That's right! Ya herrd me! I'M TAKING CHRISTMAS BACK!!

Will it be a refugee Christmas? Maybe. We'll see who needs somewhere to go. Will I be cookin' like a mad woman? Damn right I will!! In MY house!! What's on the menu? Well, don't know fo' sho'. What I DO know is there is a 7.25# rib roast waiting to meet its fate along with a 8.6# ham. The rest, I'll figure later! NO ONE will be hungry! I guaran-damn-tee that!!

Merry Fucking Christmas, Bioch!!

Prop 8: The Musical

2008-12-03T23:05:00.001-08:00

See more Jack Black videos at Funny or Die

Funniest Thing EVER!!

2008-12-03T21:30:00.000-08:00

I soooooo needed a laugh when I read this article... http://news.ninemsn.com.au/article.aspx?id=665847&rss=yes

Next post...The unmitigated gall of stones...

The Great Train Robbery

2008-12-01T13:56:00.000-08:00

We went on a fabulous trip on Amtrak up to Washington for Thanksgiving. We went to visit the cousins. Great, great fun!!! But alas, on the way up, someone went INTO our cabin (we had a sleeper car) and STOLE my phone! Fucker. Here's the thing, I'm getting a new phone for Christmas anyway. My phone is broken, you can only hear it on speakerphone or with a headset. So I hope when they go to use it they are pissed off because it's broken!! HA!! Take that!!! I canceled the service on it damn fast too so...no luck there. I have a StuffBak sticker on it. It would behoove them to call the number and collect the $50 reward on it. Which at this point, I don't think I'm willing to pay. Phone is crap anyway. Well not crap, but not worth the reward.

I've sent Amtrak a note asking where to report a complaint or stolen item report. So we'll see where that goes.

I bought my mother a GoPhone for Mother's day. She never uses it. In fact let the minutes expire. *sigh* So I am gonna ask her to borrow it until I get my new phone.

Bye, phone...was good while it lasted.
Hope you're happy in you're home...

OK now I'm off to go do homework and practice piano before class tonight....the torture never ends...

You know...

2008-11-19T22:05:00.000-08:00

Rednecks are confused as hell at seeing this:

Now you know good ol' President Elect Obama is sittin' at home chillin' like pfffft whatev' fool.

If I WERE Al Qaeda, I'd be more worried about Michelle...You do NOT want to piss off a black woman. Next thing you know, you'll be hearing about she went there, found ALL their asses and beat the crap out of them. Have 'em callin' for they mamas. Shoooooot! Lord I can just hear it too...listen...you'll hear it...

Can you guess the theme?

2008-11-14T21:45:00.000-08:00

I knew you could.

Yes, Sir!!

2008-11-06T16:56:00.000-08:00

UPDATE:
I ordered two copies of this. I think I will have one framed.

YES WE DID!!!

2008-11-04T21:10:00.000-08:00

Mr. President

Honestly, never in my life did I think I would see this day. I've never been so proud of our country. I'm not ashamed to say, I cried. I have not been this euphoric since 2001. I have never felt such hope. Most importantly, we will never again have to lie to our children when we tell them,

"You can be anything you want."

Below is the statement by Hillary Clinton on Barack Obama's victory in the presidential race:

"Tonight, we are celebrating an historic victory for the American people. This was a long and hard fought campaign but the result was well worth the wait.

Together, under the leadership of President Barack Obama, Vice President Joe Biden, and a Democratic Congress, we will chart a better course to build a new economy and rebuild our leadership in the world. And I look forward to doing all that I can to support President Obama and Vice President Biden in the difficult work that lies ahead.

For too long, middle class families in this country have felt invisible, struggling alone as wages stagnate, jobs disappear, and the costs of daily life climb upward. In quiet, solitary acts of citizenship, American voters gave voice to their hopes and their values, voted for change, and refused to be invisible any longer."

To President Obama:

You understand the burden you are about to assume. Just so you know, we got you.
______________________________________________________________

Text of Democrat Barack Obama's speech in Chicago after winning the presidential election, as transcribed by CQ Transcriptions:

___

OBAMA: Hello, Chicago.

If there is anyone out there who still doubts that America is a place where all things are possible, who still wonders if the dream of our founders is alive in our time, who still questions the power of our democracy, tonight is your answer.

It's the answer told by lines that stretched around schools and churches in numbers this nation has never seen, by people who waited three hours and four hours, many for the first time in their lives, because they believed that this time must be different, that their voices could be that difference.

It's the answer spoken by young and old, rich and poor, Democrat and Republican, black, white, Hispanic, Asian, Native American, gay, straight, disabled and not disabled. Americans who sent a message to the world that we have never been just a collection of individuals or a collection of red states and blue states.

We are, and always will be, the United States of America.

It's the answer that led those who've been told for so long by so many to be cynical and fearful and doubtful about what we can achieve to put their hands on the arc of history and bend it once more toward the hope of a better day.

It's been a long time coming, but tonight, because of what we did on this date in this election at this defining moment change has come to America.

A little bit earlier this evening, I received an extraordinarily gracious call from Senator McCain.

Senator McCain fought long and hard in this campaign. And he's fought even longer and harder for the country that he loves. He has endured sacrifices for America that most of us cannot begin to imagine. We are better off for the service rendered by this brave and selfless leader.

I congratulate him; I congratulate Governor Palin for all that they've achieved. And I look forward to working with them to renew this nation's promise in the months ahead.

I want to thank my partner in this journey, a man who campaigned from his heart, and spoke for the men and women he grew up with on the streets of Scranton ... and rode with on the train home to Delaware, the vice president-elect of the United States, Joe Biden.

And I would not be standing here tonight without the unyielding support of my best friend for the last 16 years ... the rock of our family, the love of my life, the nation's next first lady ... Michelle Obama.

Sasha and Malia ... I love you both more than you can imagine. And you have earned the new puppy that's coming with us ...to the new White House.

And while she's no longer with us, I know my grandmother's watching, along with the family that made me who I am. I miss them tonight. I know that my debt to them is beyond measure.

To my sister Maya, my sister Alma, all my other brothers and sisters, thank you so much for all the support that you've given me. I am grateful to them.

And to my campaign manager, David Plouffe ... the unsung hero of this campaign, who built the best — the best political campaign, I think, in the history of the United States of America.

To my chief strategist David Axelrod ... who's been a partner with me every step of the way.

To the best campaign team ever assembled in the history of politics ... you made this happen, and I am forever grateful for what you've sacrificed to get it done.

But above all, I will never forget who this victory truly belongs to. It belongs to you. It belongs to you.

I was never the likeliest candidate for this office. We didn't start with much money or many endorsements. Our campaign was not hatched in the halls of Washington. It began in the backyards of Des Moines and the living rooms of Concord and the front porches of Charleston. It was built by working men and women who dug into what little savings they had to give $5 and $10 and $20 to the cause.

It grew strength from the young people who rejected the myth of their generation's apathy ... who left their homes and their families for jobs that offered little pay and less sleep.

It drew strength from the not-so-young people who braved the bitter cold and scorching heat to knock on doors of perfect strangers, and from the millions of Americans who volunteered and organized and proved that more than two centuries later a government of the people, by the people, and for the people has not perished from the Earth.

This is your victory.

And I know you didn't do this just to win an election. And I know you didn't do it for me.

You did it because you understand the enormity of the task that lies ahead. For even as we celebrate tonight, we know the challenges that tomorrow will bring are the greatest of our lifetime — two wars, a planet in peril, the worst financial crisis in a century.

Even as we stand here tonight, we know there are brave Americans waking up in the deserts of Iraq and the mountains of Afghanistan to risk their lives for us.

There are mothers and fathers who will lie awake after the children fall asleep and wonder how they'll make the mortgage or pay their doctors' bills or save enough for their child's college education.

There's new energy to harness, new jobs to be created, new schools to build, and threats to meet, alliances to repair.

The road ahead will be long. Our climb will be steep. We may not get there in one year or even in one term. But, America, I have never been more hopeful than I am tonight that we will get there.

I promise you, we as a people will get there.

AUDIENCE: Yes we can! Yes we can! Yes we can!

OBAMA: There will be setbacks and false starts. There are many who won't agree with every decision or policy I make as president. And we know the government can't solve every problem.

But I will always be honest with you about the challenges we face. I will listen to you, especially when we disagree. And, above all, I will ask you to join in the work of remaking this nation, the only way it's been done in America for 221 years — block by block, brick by brick, calloused hand by calloused hand.

What began 21 months ago in the depths of winter cannot end on this autumn night.

This victory alone is not the change we seek. It is only the chance for us to make that change. And that cannot happen if we go back to the way things were.

It can't happen without you, without a new spirit of service, a new spirit of sacrifice.

So let us summon a new spirit of patriotism, of responsibility, where each of us resolves to pitch in and work harder and look after not only ourselves but each other.

Let us remember that, if this financial crisis taught us anything, it's that we cannot have a thriving Wall Street while Main Street suffers.

In this country, we rise or fall as one nation, as one people. Let's resist the temptation to fall back on the same partisanship and pettiness and immaturity that has poisoned our politics for so long.

Let's remember that it was a man from this state who first carried the banner of the Republican Party to the White House, a party founded on the values of self-reliance and individual liberty and national unity.

Those are values that we all share. And while the Democratic Party has won a great victory tonight, we do so with a measure of humility and determination to heal the divides that have held back our progress.

As Lincoln said to a nation far more divided than ours, we are not enemies but friends. Though passion may have strained, it must not break our bonds of affection.

And to those Americans whose support I have yet to earn, I may not have won your vote tonight, but I hear your voices. I need your help. And I will be your president, too.

And to all those watching tonight from beyond our shores, from parliaments and palaces, to those who are huddled around radios in the forgotten corners of the world, our stories are singular, but our destiny is shared, and a new dawn of American leadership is at hand.

To those — to those who would tear the world down: We will defeat you. To those who seek peace and security: We support you. And to all those who have wondered if America's beacon still burns as bright: Tonight we proved once more that the true strength of our nation comes not from the might of our arms or the scale of our wealth, but from the enduring power of our ideals: democracy, liberty, opportunity and unyielding hope.

That's the true genius of America: that America can change. Our union can be perfected. What we've already achieved gives us hope for what we can and must achieve tomorrow.

This election had many firsts and many stories that will be told for generations. But one that's on my mind tonight's about a woman who cast her ballot in Atlanta. She's a lot like the millions of others who stood in line to make their voice heard in this election except for one thing: Ann Nixon Cooper is 106 years old.

She was born just a generation past slavery; a time when there were no cars on the road or planes in the sky; when someone like her couldn't vote for two reasons — because she was a woman and because of the color of her skin.

And tonight, I think about all that she's seen throughout her century in America — the heartache and the hope; the struggle and the progress; the times we were told that we can't, and the people who pressed on with that American creed: Yes we can.

At a time when women's voices were silenced and their hopes dismissed, she lived to see them stand up and speak out and reach for the ballot. Yes we can.

When there was despair in the dust bowl and depression across the land, she saw a nation conquer fear itself with a New Deal, new jobs, a new sense of common purpose. Yes we can.

AUDIENCE: Yes we can.

OBAMA: When the bombs fell on our harbor and tyranny threatened the world, she was there to witness a generation rise to greatness and a democracy was saved. Yes we can.

AUDIENCE: Yes we can.

OBAMA: She was there for the buses in Montgomery, the hoses in Birmingham, a bridge in Selma, and a preacher from Atlanta who told a people that We Shall Overcome. Yes we can.

AUDIENCE: Yes we can.

OBAMA: A man touched down on the moon, a wall came down in Berlin, a world was connected by our own science and imagination.

And this year, in this election, she touched her finger to a screen, and cast her vote, because after 106 years in America, through the best of times and the darkest of hours, she knows how America can change.

Yes we can.

AUDIENCE: Yes we can.

OBAMA: America, we have come so far. We have seen so much. But there is so much more to do. So tonight, let us ask ourselves — if our children should live to see the next century; if my daughters should be so lucky to live as long as Ann Nixon Cooper, what change will they see? What progress will we have made?

This is our chance to answer that call. This is our moment.

This is our time, to put our people back to work and open doors of opportunity for our kids; to restore prosperity and promote the cause of peace; to reclaim the American dream and reaffirm that fundamental truth, that, out of many, we are one; that while we breathe, we hope. And where we are met with cynicism and doubts and those who tell us that we can't, we will respond with that timeless creed that sums up the spirit of a people: Yes, we can.

Thank you. God bless you. And may God bless the United States of America.

YES WE CAN!!

2008-11-04T16:34:00.000-08:00

CROSSING MY FINGERS!!

Blue states ask for a divorce

2008-10-28T12:30:00.000-07:00

Dear Red States:

We've decided we're leaving. We intend to form our own country, and we're taking the other Blue States with us. In case you aren't aware, that includes California , Hawaii , Oregon , Washington , Minnesota , Wisconsin , Michigan , Illinois and all the Northeast. It may even include Florida and Ohio , they are seriously considering it. We've given them until Nov. 4th to decide. We believe this split will be beneficial to the nation, and especially to the people of the new country. Since we're dropping the middle states we're calling it United America, or simply the U.A.

To sum up briefly: You get Texas , Oklahoma and all the slave states. We get stem cell research and the best beaches. We get the Statue of Liberty. You get Dollywood. You can take Ted Nugent. We're keeping Bruce Springsteen and Billy Joel. You get WorldCom. We get Intel and Microsoft. You get Ole' Miss. We get Harvard and 85 percent of America 's venture capital and entrepreneurs. You get Alabama . We get two-thirds of the tax revenue, you get to make the red states pay their fair share.

Since our aggregate divorce rate is 22 percent lower than the Christian Coalition's, we get a bunch of happy families. You get a bunch of single moms, and the highest concentration of pregnant unwed teenagers. Please be aware that the U.A. will be pro-choice and anti-war, and we're going to want all our citizens back from Iraq at once. If you need people to fight, ask your evangelicals. They have kids they're apparently willing to send to their deaths for no purpose, and they don't care if you don't show pictures of their children's caskets coming home. We do wish you success in Iraq , and hope that the WMDs turn up, really we do, but we're not willing to spend our resources in Bush's Quagmire. We'd rather spend it on taking care of sick people, and educating our children.

With the Blue States in hand, we will have firm control of 80 percent of the country's fresh water, more than 90 percent of the pineapple and lettuce, 92 percent of the nation's fresh fruit, 95 percent of America's quality wines, 90 percent of all cheese, 90 percent of the high tech industry, most of the U.S. low-sulfur coal, all living redwoods, sequoias and condors, all the Ivy and Seven Sister schools plus Stanford, Cal Tech and MIT. With the Red States, on the other hand, you will have to cope with 88 percent of all obese Americans (and their projected health care costs), 92 percent of all U.S. mosquitoes, nearly 100 percent of the tornadoes, 90 percent of the hurricanes, 99 percent of all Southern Baptists, virtually 100 percent of all televangelists, Rush Limbaugh, Bob Jones University, Clemson and the University of Georgia. We get Hollywood and Yosemite , thank you.

Additionally, 38 percent of those in the Red states believe Jonah was actually swallowed by a whale, 62 percent believe life is sacred unless we're discussing the war, the death penalty or gun laws, 44 percent say that evolution is only a theory, 53 percent that Saddam was involved in 9/11 and 61 percent of you crazy Redies believe you are people with higher morals then we Bluies..

Finally, we're taking the good pot, too. You can have that dirt weed they grow in Mexico .

Peace out,

Blue States

Thanks Nic-Dad! Bahahahahahahahahahaha! ;-)

OOOOOOOOO...BUSTED!!

2008-10-26T21:50:00.000-07:00

To:
The citizens of the United States of America

From:
Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II

In light of your failure in recent years to nominate competent candidates for President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective immediately. (You should look up 'revocation' in the Oxford English Dictionary.) Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths, and territories (except Kansas, which she does not fancy). Your new Prime Minister, Gordon Brown, will appoint a Governor for America without the need for further elections. Congress and the Senate will be disbanded. A questionnaire may be circulated next year to determine whether any of you noticed. To aid in the transition to a British Crown dependency, the following rules are introduced with immediate effect:

1. The letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'colour,' 'favour,' 'labour' and 'neighbour.' Likewise, you will learn to spell 'doughnut' without skipping half the letters, and the suffix '-ize' will be replaced by the suffix '-ise.' Generally, you will be expected to raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels. (Look up 'vocabulary').

2. Using the same twenty-seven words interspersed with filler noises such as ''like' and 'you know' is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication. There is no such thing as U. S. English. We will let Microsoft know on your behalf. The Microsoft spell-checker will be adjusted to take into account the reinstated letter 'u'' and the elimination of '-ize.'

3. July 4th will no longer be celebrated as a holiday.

4. You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers, or therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers and therapists shows that you're not quite ready to be independent. Guns should only be used for shooting grouse. If you can't sort things out without suing someone or speaking to a therapist, then you're not ready to shoot grouse.

5. Therefore, you will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything more dangerous than a vegetable peeler, although a permit will be required if you wish to carry a vegetable peeler in public.

6. All intersections will be replaced with roundabouts, and you will start driving on the left side with immediate effect. At the same time, you will go metric with immediate effect and without the benefit of conversion tables. Both roundabouts and metrication will help you understand the British sense of humour.

7. The former USA will adopt UK prices on petrol (which you have been calling gasoline) of roughly $10/US gallon. Get used to it.

8. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call French fries are not real chips, and those things you insist on calling potato chips are properly called crisps. Real chips are thick cut, fried in animal fat, and dressed not with catsup but with vinegar.

9. The cold, tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is not actually beer at all. Henceforth, only proper British Bitter will be referred to as beer, and European brews of known and accepted provenance will be referred to as Lager. Australian beer is also acceptable, as they are pound for pound the greatest sporting nation on earth and it can only be due to the beer. They are also part of the British Commonwealth -- see what it did for them. American brands will be referred to as Near-Frozen Gnat's Urine, so that all can be sold without risk of further confusion.

10. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as good guys. Hollywood will also be required to cast English actors to play English characters. Watching Andie MacDowell attempt English dialogue in Four Weddings and a Funeral was an experience akin to having one's ears removed with a cheese grater.

11. You will cease playing American football. There is only one kind of proper football; you call it soccer. Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to play rugby (which has some similarities to American football, but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full Kevlar body amour like a bunch of nannies).

12. Further, you will stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to host an event called the World Series for a game which is not played outside of America. Since only 2.1% of you are aware there is a world beyond your borders, your error is understandable. You will learn cricket, and we will let you face the Australians first to take the sting out of their deliveries.

13. You must tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us mad.

14. An internal revenue agent (i.e. tax collector) from Her Majesty's Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all monies due (backdated to 1776).

15. Daily Tea Time begins promptly at 4 p.m. with proper cups, with saucers, and never mugs, with high quality biscuits (cookies) and cakes; plus strawberries (with cream) when in season.

God Save the Queen!

PS: Share this only with friends who have a good sense of humour (NOT
humor)!

Thanks Nic-Dad!

Political Humor.

2008-10-15T18:25:00.001-07:00

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

Thanks Stacy!!!

Will.i.am is cool.

I wish he would make me a video. Not sure what about but still!

"WENT LOVES NIC! WENT LOVES NIC!"

hahhahahahahahahahahahahhahhaha!

You know. Just tossin' some ideas around!

I'm gettin' my hair did!!

2008-10-14T17:50:00.000-07:00

Oh... and this...

BAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

BIG BREATH....

BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

Happy Anniversary!!!

2008-10-13T23:51:00.000-07:00

Happy Anniversary, My Love!!!

Song Dedication....

2008-09-28T00:32:00.000-07:00

I'm sure you're all tired of my whining. Well, I'm not NEARLY done whining, but I will break it up with something less...whiny... So, I would like to dedicate a song to Wentworth Miller!

What song would you dedicate and to whom? Dare you!

Dear God, Pt. 2

2008-09-22T11:40:00.000-07:00

Do you hate me? I mean, really...

Dear God,

2008-09-20T10:50:00.000-07:00

WHAT THE FUCK DID I EVER DO TO YOU!!!!!!!!

Lawdy, Lawdy, Lawdy...

2008-09-14T23:53:00.000-07:00

I find this amusing.

And this!

Not helping but funny:

Gibson/Palin Interview Transcript

Lose your house, Lose your vote (Feeling a little desperate are we?)

Troopergate (Unbelievable. Actually you should read his blog. It's good.)

OK Ladies!!! Sing it with me!!!!

2008-09-11T16:34:00.001-07:00

Lyrics

(Yeah! Hurray!)

Now you have heard of Women's Rights,
And how we've tried to reach new heights.
If we're "all created equal"...
That's us too!

(Yeah!)

But you will proba ... bly not recall
That it's not been too ... too long at all,
Since we even had the right to
Cast a vote.

(Well!)

Well, sure, some men bowed down and called us "Mrs." (Yeah!)
Let us hang the wash out and wash the dishes, (Huh!)
But when the time rolled around to elect a president...

What did they say, Sister, (What did they say?)

They said, uh, "See ya later, alligator,
And don't forget my ... my mashed potatoes,
'Cause I'm going downtown to cast my vote for president."

Oh, we were suffering until suffrage,
Not a woman here could vote, no matter what age,
Then the 19th Amendment struck down that restrictive rule. (Oh yeah!)

And now we pull down on the lever,
Cast our ballots and we endeavor
To improve our country, state, county, town, and school.

(Tell 'em 'bout it!)

Those pilgrim women who ...
Who braved the boat
Could cook the turkey, but they ...
They could not vote.
Even Betsy Ross who sewed the flag was left behind that first election day.

(What a shame, Sisters!)

Then Susan B. Anthony (Yeah!) and Julia Howe,
(Lucretia!) Lucretia Mott, (and others!) they showed us how;
They carried signs and marched in lines
Until at long last the law was passed.

Oh, we were suffering until suffrage,
Not a woman here could vote, no matter what age,
Then the 19th Amendment struck down that restrictive rule. (Oh yeah!)

And now we pull down on the lever,
Cast our ballots and we endeavor
To improve our country, state, county, town, and school. (Right On! Right On!)

Yes the 19th Amendment
Struck down that restrictive rule. (Right On! Right On!)

Yes the 19th Amendment
Struck down that restrictive rule.
(Yeah, yeah!
Yeah, yeah!
Right on!
We got it now!)

Since 1920...
Sisters, unite!
Vote on!

That's just more fun than decent people otta have! Dare you to sing it when you go vote!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

R.I.P.

2008-09-10T20:39:00.001-07:00

My good friend Sciwriter's car has gone to the great parking lot in the sky.
Please pause for a moment of silence for
"The Peanut"

Peanut, you were loved, and will be missed. Rest in peace. Amen.

I Love Will Smith

2008-09-09T09:39:00.000-07:00

Check it out. I cracked up. I wish I knew him. I wish he were my friend! LOLOLOLOL

http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1829482/

Woman of Steel

2008-09-05T21:13:00.000-07:00

Quote of the Day - John N. Mitchell - "The finest steel has to go through the hottest fire."

Hmmmm...wonder what grade of steel I am...

Do you know what grade you are?

Feel free to move about your life...not.

2008-09-01T23:08:00.000-07:00

I have to say. I'm a little bummed. I have a friend who is making me feel bad for going back to school. You'd think they'd be happy for me, the opportunity to better my life. I get a better education, I can get a better job and make more money. More freedom, more time. I was hoping for a little encouragement, but instead, I'm made to feel guilty. I get they are sad, we've spent a lot of time together, and there will be some loneliness, but it's not like we won't be spending any time talking. My fear and excitement has been replaced by guilt and sadness. I'm not sure what to do about it. I guess there's nothing to do about it. I lead my life, I do what I can for those I can and take care of myself in the process. Which I think is the wrong priority. I should do what I need to do for me right now. Everything else should fall second.

Honestly, am I being selfish again? I know that's my tendency. (If you search the blog for "selfish" you'll find my other posts on how I'm selfish.) How do I make it right for everyone? Some advice would be great.

Woof!

2008-09-01T19:11:00.000-07:00

Well boys and girls, it's back to school time. Even for me. My God!! WHAT WAS I THINKING!!!! I'm a lousy student! It's so hard for me. I 'm terrible at memorization. I freeze up when I have to write a paper. I don't write that well anyway! On top of it, I have personal stuff going on which may interfere with my studies. I'll talk to the teachers about it. I don't really want to scrub the semester, so hopefully they will work with me. After all, it's not like I'm some kid trying get out of doing work. *bats eyelashes* So, what am I taking? Well, I'll tell ya!

ENGL 1C Critical Reasoning and Writing - this is online so that should be ok with the medical stuff.

INTRO GEOLOGY - I have to go in for that. Could be a problem but it's only twice a week so...

BEGINNING PIANO - MUS 4B - I haven't touched a piano in years this should be humiliating. It also falls on Prison Break night. Thank goodness for Tivo. (Not that I have high hopes for the season.)

POLS 4 Introduction to International Relations - Sooo not political but in light of the current affairs, could be good. Also an online class.

So, 12 units. Full time. I've been trying to get some of the reading done ahead of time. Not too successful though. I waited a while to get the books. Which I did through Amazon Marketplace and saved like $150! College bookstores are such a racket. I tell you it was like giving the bookstore a giant middle finger! Felt good. With the online classes it still allows me enough time to continue to look for a job too.

If anyone would be willing to write any of my papers for me I would be most appreciative! Just sayin'. OH! Do you have any sure fire study skills? Tricks? Tips? Help an old dog out! How do you feel about recording class lectures? Help? Hinder? Highlighters? How do you take notes? Do you take notes? Pen and Paper? Computer? Any tips for taking tests? See, I'm freaking out. Lord help me.

On a different note, what are you all looking forward to watching this season? Are there any good shows coming on? I haven't really been paying attention.

I Declare...

2008-08-31T20:37:00.000-07:00

OK, so I was looking at The Declaration of Independence (shut up, I'm not a total moron!) and I read this line that really sounded like what we need to do this election.

"But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security." - The Declaration of Independence

Just sayin'...

Vrooom!

2008-08-27T21:25:00.000-07:00

I don't know why, I should be used to it by now, but I'm amazed at how quickly Depression strikes. It goes from 0 to 60 in nothing flat. Not too surprising. What is surprising is how quickly it goes from 60 to suggesting you turn the wheel toward the cliff.

*sigh*

Don't mind me. I'm just indulging my own selfish nature. I'll get over it.

YES. WE. CAN.

2008-08-23T20:09:00.000-07:00

I'm not a political person. Not by any stretch of the imagination. But I will say that I vote. I always vote. I want the right to complain. LOL. So, all I really care about is that you DO vote. Mostly I don't care for whom and for what. It's just important. If you don't ask for what you want, you'll never get it. So tell our elected officials what you want. You put them there, make yourself heard.

I ran across this video and I got all choked up. First time that has ever happened for me regarding politics. Like I said. I don't care who you vote for, Obama or McCain, JUST VOTE!!

(But you have to admit this video rocked! LOL)

Text:

It was a creed written into the founding documents that declared the destiny of a nation.
Yes we can.
It was whispered by slaves and abolitionists as they blazed a trail toward freedom.
Yes we can. Yes we can.
It was sung by immigrants as they struck out from distant shores
and pioneers who pushed westward against an unforgiving wilderness.
Yes we can. Yes we can.
It was the call of workers who organized;
women who reached for the ballots;
a President who chose the moon as our new frontier;
and a King who took us to the mountain-top and pointed the way to the Promised Land.
Yes we can to justice and equality.
(yes we can, yes we can, yes we can, yes we can…)

Yes we can to opportunity and prosperity.
Yes we can to opportunity and prosperity.
Yes we can heal this nation.
Yes we can repair this world.
Yes we can. Si Se Puede
(yes we can, yes we can, yes we can, yes we can…)

We know the battle ahead will be long,
but always remember that no matter what obstacles stand in our way,
nothing can stand in the way of the power of millions of voices calling for change.
We want change!
(We want change! We want change! We want change…)

We have been told we cannot do this by a chorus of cynics who will only grow louder and more dissonant.
We’ve been asked to pause for a reality check.
We’ve been warned against offering the people of this nation false hope.
But in the unlikely story that is America, there has never been anything false about hope. We want change!
(We want change! I want change! We want change! I want change…)

The hopes of the little girl who goes to a crumbling school in Dillon are the same as the dreams of the boy who learns on the streets of LA;
we will remember that there is something happening in America;
that we are not as divided as our politics suggests;
that we are one people;
we are one nation;
and together, we will begin the next great chapter in America’s story with three words that will ring from coast to coast;
from sea to shining sea - Yes. We. Can.
(yes we can, yes we can, yes we can, yes we can, yes we can, yes we can, yes we can, yes we can…)

will.i.am on the song.

Original Speech Text (Man oh man do I wish I could write like this!!)

Yes We Can Song Info

“Yes We Can” is a song inspired by a speech delivered by Barack Obama following the 2008 New Hampshire primary, derived from the union catchcry “Yes we can”.

The song was released on February 2, 2008 by the Black Eyed Peas member will.i.am on Dipdive.com and also on YouTube under the username ‘WeCan08′.

Although the lyrics are entirely quotations from a speech delivered by Sen. Obama in New Hampshire during the 2008 campaign, his campaign had no involvement in its production.
The music viral video, shot in a sparse black-and-white, features Barack Obama’s image in collage fashion; the performers comprise a veritable Greek chorus echoing his words in a hip-hop call-and-response manner as his voice plays in the background.

Mmmmm...Wentworth....

2008-08-19T22:51:00.000-07:00

Countdown to Prison Break

What to do, what to do...

2008-08-16T00:48:00.000-07:00

Remember a while ago when I ran away. Needed a few days to collect myself. Someone called it my "Walkabout". I'm feeling the need to flee again. I now recognize it as anxiety. An attack I suppose. So...Should I stay or should I go? I really don't know. *Sigh*

Wedding Update

2008-06-27T23:31:00.001-07:00

Drinks. Piano Bar. Leggo's. That's all I have to say about that.

Hair today, gone tomorrow

2008-06-26T21:49:00.000-07:00

Well, the plan was to have my hair done with the rest of the other bride's maids on Saturday. But I got a message saying, that the stylist wasn't comfortable working on African American hair...Now, I am sure she had visions of Erykah Badu walking up in there,

and I can see how that would be intimidating...but those of you who know me know...

Anyway, I found a stylist today who blew my hair out straight and curled an pinned it. I should be able to recreate it Saturday...I hope. I guess I will try to sleep sitting up.

Wedding Weekend

2008-06-25T21:57:00.001-07:00

This weekend I am going to a wedding. Well not just going to a wedding, I'm a bridesmaid! So, hence the need for the new shoes to go with the dress! Woot!

TOMORROW...

Mani-Pedi-Wax! Yay me!! I'm not doing the BIG wax, just the brows and such.

The festivities start Friday. Rehearsal, then dinner. Then Saturday, I guess we all get together and we make favors or decorate or something. Not sure. I'm just gonna go where the bride tells me. Then there is hair and makeup. Believe you me, hair needs a lot of work. Poor woman. She's got her work cut out for her. I'm actually quite freaked out about the hair. My hair...needs help. It's having issues. I don't want to go into it...it bothers me way too much. Anywho...

It should be a wonderful day. I'll let you all know how it turns out. Will I post pictures? Maybe. We'll see.

Oh and a bit of fun!

Nicbeast's Random Movie Quote:

'I find your lack of faith disturbing.'

- Darth Vader, Star Wars

Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com

WOOOO HOOOO!!!!

2008-06-24T21:59:00.000-07:00

I GOT SHOES!! I GOT SHOES!! I GOT SHOES!! I love shoes...

Aren't they purdy!!

Oh, and a bra...
Now I can wear my cute strapless tops! Woot!

Tomorrow!!!!

2008-06-23T22:00:00.000-07:00

I get to buy shoooooooes!!!
I get to buy shoooooooes!!!
I get to buy shoooooooes!!!
I get to buy shoooooooes!!!
I get to buy shoooooooes!!!
I get to buy shoooooooes!!!
I get to buy shoooooooes!!!
I get to buy shoooooooes!!!
I get to buy shoooooooes!!!
I get to buy shoooooooes!!!
I get to buy shoooooooes!!!
I get to buy shoooooooes!!!
I get to buy shoooooooes!!!
I get to buy shoooooooes!!!
I get to buy shoooooooes!!!
I get to buy shoooooooes!!!

Black strappy sandals...

HERE!!
I !!
COME!!

I hate it when...

2008-06-22T18:53:00.001-07:00

You go into the freezer to get your peach sorbet and someone has eaten it! I mean, how rude and inconsiderate and disrespectful. Could you ate least tell me you have taken the last of things? How many times have we HAD this conversation!! Geeze!

I bet Wentworth would never do that.

Mmmmmmmm...Wentworth...

I had a dream...and other news.

2008-06-20T10:42:00.000-07:00

It was an odd dream...it's one of those dreams that you can trace back to everything that you did that day, all of which was on TV. Except the Wentworth part...for obvious reasons.

In this dream, I was friends with Oprah Winfrey. We dished, talked fake eyelashes and did the general hang out thing. So she wanted me to come to one of the shows she was taping. She was having some religious zealot on. So, went to the show to watch he had this huge list of rules that the followers must abide by. Funny the only one I can remember is no threesomes. HAHAHA!

Apparently he was so annoying Oprah herself walked out on the interview. We were walking back to our cars (hers was a limo) laughing at him. This is where I met up with two young teenage girls who I apparently know. They were getting into another limo with this shady looking driver. I was trying to tell them they should not do what ever it was they were planning because some how I knew they would end up dead. For some reason I didn't tell them about the getting dead thing, so they though I was worried about then having sex. "Don't worry we have condoms." They left I don't know what happened to them.

Then I went to watch a triathlon to watch a dying friend do her part in it. The team finished and we all went crazy! YAY YOU! Wooohoooo!! It was a happy moment. Then while we were all sitting around at this picnic table who shows up?

WENTWORTH MILLER. My heart was all aflutter. Apparently I knew him for some time. We were friends. He was sitting across from me so I got the best view. He brought treats. I declined. He insisted, he brought plenty. They were these deliciously, evil, baked, cinnamon goodness. You bite into this little pocket and all this yumminess oozes out.

Damn Wentworth and his evil baked goods! Tell me THAT'S not a perfect dream. Went and baked goods...God help me. Anyway, there we were sitting at the table talking and I look over and Went is staring at me. Like STARING at me! Like I'm a girl! I got embarrassed and tried to hide it, blush did the girly thing. He smiles. OMG! He's flirting with me! We go on talking and such and when I look back he's doing the same thing to the girl sitting next to him! BASTARD! I tell myself, I will not let it bother me. It's no big deal. Then a few minutes later, he's flirting with me again! Ladies and gentlemen, Wentworth Miller is a tease. Bah!

In other news, a couple weeks ago, I went to visit my best friend and we took a Kayaking class...I know, I know! I'm an INDOOR GIRL! But, I like water, and it was a nice warm day and it was fun! We all even passed the class! Woot! No one drowned, no one fell out. It was a good day.

Went to the movies and saw The Happening. I really liked it. I think it's gonna piss a lot of people off. Go M. Night! I just know he's sitting on his couch saying,(spoiler blacked out) "Take that Al Gore, I can make an environmental movie too!" I totally get his sense of humor!

So I have also been pricing our trip to Egypt. I'm excited. Been slaking on my Arabic though. We will have to wait to see as I have some stuff coming up on when we can actually go.

I'm enrolled in school. That's all I have to say about that.

Let's see...what else...Oh read another series by Mary Janice Davidson (it's just two books) The Fred the Mermaid series. Quick, fun read.

Oh, someone gave me a stomach virus. Some things you should not share. Just when I got over that, I went to go to the kayaking class, and best friends kids gave me a cold of some sort. THEN, I have this other issue, and that kicked in. It was a rough couple weeks.

So, what's new with you?

And Behind Door #3?

2008-05-28T11:06:00.000-07:00

Drumroll.........................

Viral Gastroenteritis!!

*insert fanfare*

So be careful what you wish for because you may get it. I should have been clearer about what I wanted to be behind door number three. The virus kept me from doing what I didn't want to do, but it also kept me from doing anything else. Oh well.

Just in case you're interested. Viral Gastroenteritis

My Seduction Style

2008-05-24T20:21:00.000-07:00

HAHAHHAHAHAHAAH. Thanks Kris!

Sigh

2008-05-24T17:32:00.000-07:00

Well it's looking progressively like door number one. Guess what I want doesn't matter.

Damned if you do, damned if you don't...

2008-05-23T22:48:00.000-07:00

There's not much worse when you're faced with two options, and both have bad outcomes.

The first outcome you hurt yourself, by doing what you don't want to do.

The second, you do what you want but hurt the other person.

I need door number three.

Hot Stuff!

2008-05-21T23:33:00.000-07:00

I was surprised a few weeks back with tickets to see Duran Duran. It was a good surprise. I've been a fan for a long time. John Taylor is STILL on my laminated list. They looked really happy. I was glad to see it. Whoever the sound guy and the camera man were didn't know the music. So some of the sound was off and the camera work didn't match the songs. An example, the camera man would find the guitar solo a few bars after it began. Silly. Here's a video. lol.

Let's see...what else has happened...OH. The fucktards are on the run! heh.

I'm going back to school! WOOT! I'm scared to death. I'm a lousey student. But, it turns out I'm three classes from an AA. I THINK I am about 1-2 semesters from a B.A. Crazy huh? So, we'll see.

Now for some bad news... *WAILING* I have to go camping!!!! I am such an indoor girl. I hate camping. HATE IT! HATE IT! HATE IT! Oh well. I printed out my camping checklist. Yes I have a checklist. I hate to be with out my stuff. It's like 5 pages. I think it has like 200 items. Yeah I know it's a lot. But a majority are small. Stuff like Q-Tips and tooth paste. In any case...yeah. Hopefully I won't kill anyone in a fit of hysteria.

Oh yeah, Went came out...IN SHORTS!!!

This makes me happy. *sigh*

Mmmmmmm...Thanks Kris

2008-04-27T20:43:00.000-07:00

What Your Taste in Chocolate Says About You

You are sweet, mellow, and easily satisfied.

You don't like anything too intense and dramatic.

Deep down, you're a kid at heart... and you're nostalgic for the past.

You are emotionally expressive and sensitive.

You're effected by everything around you.

Your friends appreciate your open heart, but they are afraid of hurting your feelings.

You love the feeling of accomplishment. You enjoy doing what's important.

You feel lost when you have to do frivolous tasks or hang out with shallow people.

The Chocolate Oracle

A Day in the Life...

2008-04-24T21:24:00.001-07:00

Today was a tiring day. I had a rough night, full of nightmares. What were they? Not telling you. I don't need people emailing me telling me what they mean. I know what they mean. Loss and rejection. Take that. So when my emotions couldn't take it anymore, I did what I always do. I go cry in the shower. Now, when I say I cried in the shower let me help you understand. I CRIED! Like wailing. Like someone had died. I was in full grief mode. You know that kid who cries so uncontrollably they start to dry heave? That was me. I was crying so hard, I was dry heaving. I cried until the water got cold then I got out and cried. I finally calmed myself down.

Later I worked on a project with a friend for three hours. Very productive. I feel good about it.

This week the landscapers did their little landscaping thing, which included laying down tanbark. Why is this important? Remember this? (scroll down to pic of cat) Yes, the cat has started bringing us sticks again. Now she has yards and yard of tanbark to bring to us. We got eight sticks tonight. She was sooooo proud of herself. Funny girl. Like this...but not white and no water...

So, now, I am really tired. My head hurts, I really want to go to sleep, and I well, obviously will. But I hope to do it soon.

School Daze

2008-04-23T23:47:00.000-07:00

Well looks like, maybe, I am going back to school. Turns out I am 3 classes away from an AA. Looking at those classes, I know why I never took them! LOL. Is it wrong I don't care about women's studies or the sociology of minorities? Pfffffffffft. So, we'll see. I'm taking a placement test next week. Maybe they offer the classes I want over the summer. Last summer they offered two of them and one was online which would be PERFECT!

Wish me luck.

"Time is a currency that sometimes must be borrowed against to increase its wealth."
Cole Goodwin

HAHAHAHAHAAHA!! Someone wrote me poems!!!

2008-04-16T22:13:00.000-07:00

Ode to Nic & Went!

There was a young girl from Gilroy,

Who had a big crush on a boy.

His name is Wentworth Miller,

And she really wants him to drill her;

Oh if only there was a Wentworth sex toy!

and if that weren't enough...

Nicbeast Obsession!

She's so crazy for Wentworth Miller,
She's stalked him here and there.
She'd willingly let him do anything to her,
With extreme eagerness and flair.

Went Miller is Nicbeast's obsession,
He is on her laminated list.
Nic wants him with a passion,
Prison Break she cannot resist.

Wentworth is Nic's obsessive fantasy,
An episode she will not miss.
Nic dotes on Wentworth all can see,
Wanting Went for a passionate kiss.

Nicbeast and the girls of Wet for Went,
They seek Went's body to enslave.
Their perfect vision of a Hollywood Gent,
Nic will take her obsession to her grave.

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU JAMIE!!!!!!!!!!!

Spring is in the air...

2008-04-14T20:00:00.000-07:00

What do you know, an actual post. So...what's been going on. Well, I've had some medical issues that I HOPE are all done now. *Crosses Fingers*

Looks like the fucktards are feeling the pressure. heh.

I did our taxes again this year. Got a pretty good refund. I am pleased.

Went to the San Jose Earthquakes opening game in Oakland. Believe it or not, it was HOT AS HELL! Can you say sunburn? I knew you could. How did the Quakes do? Uh...let's just say, they are a work in progress. Go Quakes! I decided to plant a herb and veggie garden. First you should know, I have a black thumb. I kill plants. My mother at one point started buying me fake plants because I killed the real ones, and she thought it was just cruel to keep doing that to innocent plant life.

Then as I was asking another friend of mine how to transplant my seedlings, she said you know I've been knowing you for years, and every spring you get the urge to grow things. Hmmmm...I do? What do you know? So she tells me what to do, and today, I DO IT! I replanted all my seedlings. I had some others that I did earlier. Two kinds of squash, cucumbers, green onions, tomatoes. My green onions, are not looking good. I dropped some seeds into the post just to see what would happen. I initially grew them in peat pellets. So...we'll see. So today I transplanted green peppers, jalepenos, a surprise pack of tomatoes, cilantro, itallian basil, thyme, oregeno, rosemary...I think that's it. So, here they are before...And YES I grew them from seeds!!!
And here they are after...
In other news...I got new knitting needles. They're so purdy! Knitpicks.

But I got this set...

I also got some new crochet hooks too. They are sooooooooo nice.

Addi Comfort Grip Hook

I think that's all I got for now.

Oh, and just for good measure.

God I love a man in glasses...

Actually I love this man in everything...or....*evil grin*

Hillarious

2008-04-01T22:14:00.000-07:00

Do your self a favor and go check this out! It's funny as hell!!

WFW

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SCIWRITER!!

2008-04-01T18:30:00.000-07:00

HOPE YOU HAVE A WONDERFUL DAY!!!!!

TO THE MAN

2008-03-27T16:26:00.000-07:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!

Song Dedication

2008-03-26T15:50:00.000-07:00

This is for, well, you know who you are.

Cochise
Audioslave

Well I been watchin
While you been coughin
Ive been drinking life
While you been nausous
And so I drink to health
While you kill yourself
And I got just one thing
That I can offer

Go and save yourself
Take it out on me
Go and and save yourself
Take it out on me yea

Well Im not a martyr
Im not a prophet
And I wont preach to you
But heres a caution
You better understand
That I wont hold your hand
But if it helps you mend
Then I wont stop it

Go and save yourself
Take it out on me
Go and save yourself
Take it out on me
Go and save yourself
Take it out on me
Go and save yourself
Take it out on me yea

Go if you want
And I'll see you in the bottom
Where you crawl
On my skin
And put the blame on me
So you dont feel a thing

Go and save yourself
Take it out on me
Go and save yourself
Take it out on me
Go and save yourself
Take it out on me
Go and save yourself
Take it out on me yea

And a poem, just for good measure.

Instructions
Cole Goodwin

Beat, Strike, Thrash, Pound
Until I am subdued and fetal

Consume, Deplete, Siphon, Drain
Until I am nearly empty

Wait, Linger, Stay, Terry
Until I am replenished

Start again at the beginning.

I'm a Selfish Bitch

2008-03-10T14:02:00.001-07:00

There must be something in pattern of the people I pick as friends. A majority of them surprise me in their response to my moods. I don’t know if I’m really selfish, which I don’t feel I am, or I am really needy, which, I have to admit wouldn’t surprise me with all that’s going on in my life right now. But, it seems that I am not allowed to have a bad day. If I do, people seem put out by it, like it inconveniences them. Inside I want to scream, “IT’S NOT ALL ABOUT YOU!” I have needs. I have bad days. I’m sorry I can’t attend to your wants right now, but I have to take care of my self for a minute. I’m sorry if I’m slow to understand what you’re saying, I realize I’m not the brightest bulb in the pack, but I am trying to process a lot of information. I admit to not being at my best at the moment, but can you cut me a break, I’m doing the best I can. But, I’ll say nothing. Which is wrong I know. Maybe I’ll say something later when I’m not so upset and hurt, then again maybe not.

UPDATE:

Not only am I a selfish bitch, but I am also a liar. Am I lying about being a selfish bitch. I don't think so, but maybe I'm pathological. And people wonder why drug companies make antidepressants.

That will teach me to get my hopes up and allow myself to feel a little happiness. It's just not allowed apparently.

Damnit!

2008-02-21T10:52:00.001-08:00

Broken

Crack my eggshell heart on the spine of a book
Watch the bruised and scarred memories spill out in the light of day
Over the pages and into a cracked life
Pain hidden in the dark and under pressure
The book’s words demand their due

The debt is paid with vials of blood
Syringes of synthetic life
Aspirated hope
Inconsolable tears and unfathomable grief
All shed from denial of instinctual needs

Close the pages and return to lying
My world is ok, my soul is happy
Sweep the crimson mess under the smile
Return the empty shell to my chest.

Stupid books up heaving your perfectly manicured emotions.

Gauisus Fucking Natalis

2008-01-28T23:18:00.000-08:00

11 days and counting... *sigh*

*looks for cover*

Happy New Year!!!!

2007-12-27T21:24:00.000-08:00

I've been doing some thinking today. About what you ask? Well, I'll tell you. About the upcoming year. When I was 13 years old, I made a New Year's Resolution to never make another New Year's Resolution. It's the only one I have ever kept. EVER.

I think Resolution is too strong a word; too absolute. It's like the difference between Idea and Belief. You can change an idea, but it's harder to change a belief. (Yes I know I stole that...back off!)

Sometimes life gets in the way of resolutions. Then, at the end of the year when you look back at your life, you have a feeling of failure when you didn't keep your resolutions. Who needs that? Life is hard enough as it is.

So I propose, instead of a New Year's Resolution, to have a New Year's Hope. What do you think? I'll get you started, here are a few of my hopes for the upcoming year, in no particular order.

I hope to improve my overall health. (Look at those abs...mercy)

I hope to get rid of some particular medical issues.
I hope other medical endeavors stick around.
I hope to get more organized. (Stop laughing!)

I hope to better manage my time. (I SAID stop LAUGHING)

I hope to be more creative.

I hope to not have to find another job, but if I do, it's one I will enjoy.
I hope justice prevails. (Fucktards)
I hope my friends and family are happy and healthy.
I hope to meet more of my online friends, and see the others I have met again.

I hope to meet Wentworth Miller. (You knew that would be in there!)

I'd like to get better at knitting and crocheting.

I would like to go back to school.

Ok, so that's a lot, but what does it matter? The weren't resolutions, just hopes and wishes.

So, what are your hopes and wishes? Leave me a comment!

One last one. I hope and wish the new year bring you all your hopes and wishes.