What's your sign...

Monday, July 19, 2010

...and I did it to myself!

I joined a different gym and was excited to learn they had classes.  My last gym didn't.  Hell, they didn't even have air conditioning, they will be fired tomorrow.  So I roll in for the 5:00 P.M. class, here is how it went.

5:00  -  Naively optomistic
5:03 -  Wow this is fun!
5:06 -  Geeze!  This is a Great work out!
5:10 - It's only been 10 minutes?  ~worry sets in~
5:15 - Holy cow!  45 more minutes of this
5:19 - Instructor yelling at us to "CHAKE IT!  CHAKE IT!" (Translation: Shake it! Shake it!)
5:25 - What are the symptoms of your lungs exploding?
5:27 - I think it feels like this.
5:30 - Are those my lungs lying there?
5:37 - No that is not apathy on my face, it's a death mask.
5:45 -  Oh thank God, only 15 more minutes of this.
5:45:20 - Jesus Christ!  There is 15 more minutes of this.
5:55 -  We enter the cool down phase which should include, oxygen, stretchers and a drip IV.

6:05 - Get ambushed bye the gym staff. 
"Have a good workout?"
"Yes thank you."
"What did you do?"
"Took the Zumba class."
"Is that all you do here?"
"No, I just joined Saturday."
"Have you done your free orientation yet?"
"Is that the tour?"
"No, one of the trainers shows you how to use all the equipment."
"No." My muscles begin to quiver.
"Well let's set you up!"
Clearly he has not taken the Zumba class or he wouldn't be asking me this.  But since my head is all full of Wrackspurts I agree to go in at 4:00 tomorrow and learn how to use the equipment.  Last time I did that, I couldn't move for a week.  I did this to myself...

I chose the picture because it reminded my of a chalk body outline.

See?