TO THE MAN

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!

Song Dedication

This is for, well, you know who you are.

Cochise
Audioslave

Well I been watchin
While you been coughin
Ive been drinking life
While you been nausous
And so I drink to health
While you kill yourself
And I got just one thing
That I can offer

Go and save yourself
Take it out on me
Go and and save yourself
Take it out on me yea

Well Im not a martyr
Im not a prophet
And I wont preach to you
But heres a caution
You better understand
That I wont hold your hand
But if it helps you mend
Then I wont stop it

Go and save yourself
Take it out on me
Go and save yourself
Take it out on me
Go and save yourself
Take it out on me
Go and save yourself
Take it out on me yea

Go if you want
And I'll see you in the bottom
Where you crawl
On my skin
And put the blame on me
So you dont feel a thing

Go and save yourself
Take it out on me
Go and save yourself
Take it out on me
Go and save yourself
Take it out on me
Go and save yourself
Take it out on me yea

And a poem, just for good measure.

Instructions
Cole Goodwin


Beat, Strike, Thrash, Pound
Until I am subdued and fetal

Consume, Deplete, Siphon, Drain
Until I am nearly empty

Wait, Linger, Stay, Terry
Until I am replenished

Start again at the beginning.

I'm a Selfish Bitch

There must be something in pattern of the people I pick as friends. A majority of them surprise me in their response to my moods. I don’t know if I’m really selfish, which I don’t feel I am, or I am really needy, which, I have to admit wouldn’t surprise me with all that’s going on in my life right now. But, it seems that I am not allowed to have a bad day. If I do, people seem put out by it, like it inconveniences them. Inside I want to scream, “IT’S NOT ALL ABOUT YOU!” I have needs. I have bad days. I’m sorry I can’t attend to your wants right now, but I have to take care of my self for a minute. I’m sorry if I’m slow to understand what you’re saying, I realize I’m not the brightest bulb in the pack, but I am trying to process a lot of information. I admit to not being at my best at the moment, but can you cut me a break, I’m doing the best I can. But, I’ll say nothing. Which is wrong I know. Maybe I’ll say something later when I’m not so upset and hurt, then again maybe not.


UPDATE:

Not only am I a selfish bitch, but I am also a liar. Am I lying about being a selfish bitch. I don't think so, but maybe I'm pathological. And people wonder why drug companies make antidepressants.

That will teach me to get my hopes up and allow myself to feel a little happiness. It's just not allowed apparently.

Powered by ScribeFire.