iCon. RiP

Like A Stone

On a cobweb afternoon in a room full of emptiness
By a freeway I confess I was lost in the pages
Of a book full of death
Reading I will die alone
And if we're good we'll lay to rest
Anywhere we want to go

In your house I long to be
Room by room patiently
I'll wait for you there like a stone
I'll wait for you there alone

On my deathbed I will pray to the gods and the angels
Like a pagan to anyone who will take me to heaven
To a place I recall
I was there so long ago
The sky was bruised, the wine was bled
And there you led me on

In your house I long to be
Room by room patiently
I'll wait for you there like a stone
I'll wait for you there alone
Alone

And on I read until the day was gone
And I sat in regret of all the things I've done
For all that I've blessed and all that I've wronged
In dreams until my death I will wander on

In your house I long to be
Room by room patiently
I'll wait for you there like a stone
I'll wait for you there alone
Alone
Alone

Once more with feeling...

Yep.  You guessed it!  It's that time of year one more time.  

Here's the thing.  I wasn't even thinking about it really.  I didn't have much going on.  No party planned.  There was talk of doing a Dr. Who extravaganza but nothing really came of it.  No one is coming to visit.  Nothing is scheduled.  So, essentially it crossed my mind, maybe once or twice, like is should look around and make sure there was no enemy approaching.  I did and nothing.  Then BAM.  Smacked right upside the head.  When will I learn?  I should just go away the week surrounding that day.  All alone.  Maybe a TV and a couple of books.  It seems, if I'm alone, then there is less likely for something to go and ruin or taint the day.

I mean other than the prep for the surgery last year, that was one of the best birthday's I'd had in YEARS!  Wrong, yes?  True, though.  How I wish to be in a semi private hospital room with a barfing roommate.  Sounds like heaven right about now.

"Hows your pain level?"
"Through the roof."
"OK.  We'll take care of that."
"Thank you so much."

Today is a bad day.  Really, bad, fucking day.  At least now I have a plan with contingencies built in.  I've got a death grip on that like you wouldn't believe.

So, here's to the plan.  May it fucking work.

Some may find this post offensive. You've been warned.

 Dear God,
Let me get this straight.  I got tired of all your bullshit, and looking over my shoulder and broke up with you.  Since you couldn't hurt me, you go after those close to me?  My family?  My pets?  Have I got this right?  You know what?  You're an asshole and a fucking coward!

Signed,
The Bitch Who Hates You